Love the Sinner, Hate the Sin
Yesterday, someone I know hit me with a ‘love the sinner, hate the sin,’ and my initial reaction was like ‘Wow! Fuck you too!’ I didn’t say this, of course. I didn’t react at all. The person meant well, I think, but that is just such a classic microaggression, and it’s not hard to understand why I have such a visceral negative reaction to it. I think it’s …
My Writing Rituals
I belong to Apex writers and am part of the Accelerators group, led by Forrest Wolverton. In Accelerators, Forrest uses brain research to help us unlock our writing and career goals (It’s more complicated than that, but that’s the gist). Last week, we were talking about the rituals we all use to get us in ‘the zone’ for writing, and it made me think about how we all do that, …
Gratitude and Grace
The other morning, I was awash in gratitude. Gratitude for my life, and the people who are in it. Grateful for my two jobs. Grateful that I have a home that I love. Grateful that my body is healthy. I have not always felt this way. I spent a lot of years at war with myself, hating myself, hating all of the things that I was and resenting all of …
Belonging
I’ve been listening to the audiobook of Brene Brown’s Atlas of the Heart, and it’s led me to a revelation. I love Brown’s work as a researcher, how she explicates our inner emotional landscapes and describes how our inner needs drive us. I don’t always agree 100% with her definitions, but she always gives me something to think about. Anyway, Atlas of the Heart is an attempt to map and …
Things it took me way too long to learn
Life lessons. We’ve all experienced them. It takes some of us a little longer than others to learn certain things, and I am no exception. So here are some lessons I didn’t learn until I’d been beaten over the head with them a couple of times. 1. If I’m going to remember something, I’m going to have to write it down. I don’t know how many times I had to …
Equanimity (or, the subtle art of not losing your shit)
The last two weeks has been incredibly difficult. I had a lot going on anyway, but then my son moved in with me. That wasn’t a bad thing, but he’s nineteen. And on top of the usual 19-year-old nonsense, he’s been on and off his meds and has been yo-yo-ing through various stages of a mental health crisis and the whole things has just been exhausting. Every day I do …
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